Why Does Your Cat Only Like You? Their Preferences, Explained · Kinship Leave a comment

Your cat is your particular child, however generally, it looks like you’re the just one they care about. They’ll snuggle you, however your associate? Overlook it. Associates who come over for dinner? Nah. They aren’t a fan. Impolite. Why does this occur, and what are you able to do about it?

Why does my cat solely like me?

Belief me, you’re not the one one who thinks their cat hates everybody however them. They might cover from different individuals. It’s possible you’ll suppose your cat is imply, responding to others’ advances with a hiss or swat. 

It’s widespread for cats to connect to at least one particular person and seemingly “hate” anybody else. However we now have to watch out about attaching human feelings to our kitties. Cats and people have many similarities. There are additionally many variations, particularly in the best way we expertise, analyze, and react to individuals and conditions. Let’s discuss what your cat’s choice for you and dislike of different individuals may actually imply, from their perspective. 

Why does my cat hate different individuals?

Anthropomorphizing means that we’re attaching human traits and habits to (on this case) cats. And that may get us into hassle. We regularly misinterpret alerts from our cats as a result of we’re utilizing the lens of human logic as an alternative of cat logic. 

For instance, you’ve heard the concept that cats pee outdoors the litter field out of spite. Take into consideration the emotional course of it takes to be spiteful. Your cat must resolve they’re mad at you and need to trigger you misery, take into consideration what they may do that might upset you, then do it simply so that you’d really feel unhealthy. That’s approach past cats’ capabilities. Their motives are a lot less complicated and to-the-point. What regarded vengeful and detrimental was most likely only a cat feeling anxious and needing help. 

With this in thoughts, what do you consider cats being able to (or serious about) hate? To me, that feels a bit too “human.” What we learn as hate might be a extra instinctual response, like: 

Concern or anxiousness round others

It’s widespread for cats to really feel worry or anxiousness, particularly in unfamiliar conditions or once they don’t suppose they’ve any management. 

In case your cat hasn’t had a lot optimistic publicity to different individuals, their pure response could also be to cover or use defensive aggression to maintain everybody at a protected distance. Plenty of issues can set off this response, even an individual’s scent or how loudly they converse.  

Naturally cautious

Cats might hunt within the wild, however they’re additionally the goal of different predators. Once you may be eaten by different critters, you’re instinctually a bit cautious. Some cats are extra cautious than others. They’d relatively assume hazard and go into fight-or-flight mode immediately relatively than danger ready till it’s too late. These cats could also be much less pleasant to individuals they don’t know effectively and really feel protected with. 

Particular person choice

Cats have preferences, similar to us. Your cat might choose your quiet nature to your livelier roommate, or your approach of petting over your younger nieces. It’s merely about what feels extra snug and pleasing for them. It’s possible you’ll perceive and respect these preferences greater than different individuals, main your cat to choose your organization. 

Why do cats connect themselves to at least one particular person?

There are many causes your cat might have connected themselves particularly to you. They might actually have a few individuals they’ve bonded with, whereas not eager to bond a lot with others. 

Early bonding and socialization

Cats are fashioned by their early experiences. In case your cat didn’t have a lot publicity to anybody else of their first yr or two of life, they might naturally be leery of different individuals. This has been the case with many cats adopted in the course of the COVID lockdown. There weren’t many individuals visiting and many people had been working from dwelling, limiting our cats’ experiences with company and being alone. 

If that they had publicity to others, nevertheless it wasn’t optimistic, you will get the identical end result. For instance, if somebody within the dwelling yelled loudly and scared your cat once they received on the desk, a detrimental affiliation may have been fashioned. They realized that different individuals may be scary. 

The excellent news is that it’s by no means too late to slowly and positively assist your cat get snug with issues that make them nervous, even individuals. 

Major caregiver

It’s solely pure for a cat to really feel a reference to the one who feeds them, has every day play classes, or simply makes time for cuddles. The first care giver is vital for survival and emotional wellbeing. 

Understanding their language

Cats are sensible communicators, however provided that you be taught to talk their language (or ought to I say, their physique language). It’s not straightforward for everybody to grasp {that a} delicate flip of the ears can imply they’ve had sufficient petting and would really like you to cease, or the tail going from a leisurely swish to an agitated swish can imply they’re beginning to get upset. These missed cues can result in a detrimental interplay between the cat and particular person. 

In case your cat has “chosen” you as theirs, you most likely do a very good job at catching and respecting these cues, making your cat extra snug with you than others. 

High quality time

There are such a lot of great issues to do with a cat: tossing furry mice, cuddling, watching birds collectively, and many others. When you’re the one who enjoys spending time with a cat and doing issues they love, there’s going to be a connection between the 2 of you. 

Persona preferences

Once more, cats are people. They’ve their very own preferences, even in the case of persona — however most likely not the best way you suppose. It’s extra about how the actions and demeanors of different individuals them really feel — protected, comforted, energized, afraid their tail might get stepped on, and many others.

An individual with a boisterous giggle, or somebody who talks quick and strikes quicker, could also be unsettling for a nervous cat who prefers quiet environments, gradual actions, and smooth footsteps. Alternatively, a high-energy cat might love the children operating round the home with their playful personalities. 

What you are able to do and when to hunt skilled assist

We’ve talked about many causes your cat might choose you over different individuals. If that’s only a private choice, nobody minds, it’s superb to allow them to have a favourite particular person. Alternatively, if that different particular person desires to enhance their relationship, or your cat appears genuinely afraid, you possibly can assist. 

There are optimistic coaching and desensitization methods you should use to assist cats get snug with issues they might discover scary or disagreeable. Working with an authorized feline coaching and habits advisor is an effective way to do that. They will search for potential triggers (causes your cat has points with different individuals) and provide you with a plan to vary these relationships for the higher. 

You may as well do easy issues, like:

• Make good issues occur in your cat when different persons are round. Don’t drive any interactions. Your cat ought to keep the place they really feel snug. Even when they’re hiding beneath the mattress, you possibly can take a minute right here and there to pop in and do one thing optimistic. Give treats, pets, have a fast play session, and many others. This teaches your cat, “Hey, each time different individuals present up, I get actually great things! I prefer it when different individuals present up!”

• Reward courageous habits. In case your cat is nervous to come back out round strangers, however they ultimately peek across the nook earlier than operating again beneath the mattress, reward it. In the event that they rise up the braveness to come back into the room, even when they nonetheless select to maintain their distance, reward it. In the event that they transfer nearer to somebody, (you guessed it) reward it! Once more, good issues occur in your cat once they select to be courageous round individuals.

• Reward any optimistic interactions with different individuals, regardless of how small. In case your cat walks up, sniffs their pants, then walks away, reward that sniff! If they permit a pet or select to take a seat close to somebody, reward it. These rewards may be something they love. Treats, pets, verbal reward, tossing a toy, and many others. 

In case your cat has excessive worry or anxiousness with different individuals — whether or not it’s solely once they get too shut or as quickly as they ring the doorbell — it’s a good suggestion to speak with an expert. This worry could possibly be impacting your cat’s high quality of life. 

Your veterinarian can be sure there’s nothing medical happening which will enhance your cat’s stress. You may as well talk about anxiousness medicine, pure calming dietary supplements, and different medical methods to assist your cat calm down. An authorized feline coaching and habits advisor may also help with the emotional aspect of issues, like searching for and addressing any triggers that is likely to be inflicting worry, decreasing stress, constructing confidence and extra. 

There are lots of methods to assist cats really feel snug with extra than simply their chosen human. And, hey, in the event that they love you greatest, that’s form of nice in its personal approach.

References

• Anderson, Jocelyn C. “6 Frequent Cat Behaviors Defined.” UC Davis, 19 Apr. 2021, www.ucdavis.edu/journal/6-common-cat-behaviors-explained. Accessed 6 Feb. 2025.

• Baillie, Katherine. “Demystifying Feline Habits.” Penn At this time, 19 Feb. 2020, penntoday.upenn.edu/information/demystifying-feline-behavior.

• Cornell Feline Well being Middle. “Feline Habits Issues: Aggression.” Cornell College School of Veterinary Drugs, 9 Oct. 2017, www.vet.cornell.edu/departments-centers-and-institutes/cornell-feline-health-center/health-information/feline-health-topics/feline-behavior-problems-aggression.

• Ines, Mauro, et al. “My Cat and Me—a Research of Cat Proprietor Perceptions of Their Bond and Relationship.” Animals, vol. 11, no. 6, 29 Might 2021, p. 1601, https://doi.org/10.3390/ani11061601. Accessed 2 Aug. 2021.

• Lee, Justine. “Understanding Nervousness in Cats: Serving to Cats Address Environmental Change | VETgirl Veterinary Persevering with Training Weblog.” VETgirl, 9 July 2021, vetgirlontherun.com/understanding-anxiety-in-cats-helping-cats-cope-with-environmental-change-vetgirl-veterinary-continuing-education-blog/.‌

• “Separation Nervousness | Indoor Pet Initiative.” Osu.edu, 2025, indoorpet.osu.edu/cats/problem-solving/separation-anxiety. Accessed 6 Feb. 2025.